to the Polynesian MacThoy
There was a time, long ago, when great was the turmoil in the earth,
and dark were the days, and all around was as blackest night. Through
this time of Chaos did many demons roam, and much suffering was there. And Lo, a hero did arise, and turned back the darkness, and slew the
demons, and freed us from Chaos' reign. His name has been forgotten in
the mists of time, so who cares.
Let us speak of
those who came after. A people fair of form, quick of wit, and
thirsty. So great was their thirst that they did drain the oceans dry,
for in those days it was the sweetest of water. And such was the
wailing and crying of those who loved the sea, that it did fill again
with tears of salt, and has remained so until this day.
But that was not
enough, and great were the sounds of their discontent. So loud did
they cry and carry on, that old Tuk'Tuk'Naani did rouse from his
soused slumber, and blink blearily at them.
cried they. "We must have something to
drink. O Tuk'Tuk'Naani we beseech thee,
drink we must. O! Alas!" And the whining
grew piteous indeed, and Tuk'Tuk'Naani did
grow weary of their wailing and goings on.
So, to one of their tribe did
Tuk'Tuk'Naani show the secrets of
the Brewer's Art with the stern
warning that they should shut up and
let him sleep for a bit.
And they did rejoice and sing
praises to Tuk'Tuk'Naani, but
quietly until they were safely out
of earshot. Upon which time they did
sample this new brew, and to their
wonderment, their thirst was
quenched, and their women, who were
already quite nice to look at,
became as goddesses, and they all
were funnier and smarter than
before. And such was their joy that
they did drink heartily to
Tuk'Tuk'Naani's health until they
joined him in the Sleep of Ages."
"Tuk'Tuk'Naani Brings Beer to the Polynesian MacThoy" as
recounted to Groo'Groo'Poonawnee MacThoy.