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Tuk'Tuk'Naani Brings Beer 
to the Polynesian MacThoy

There was a time, long ago, when great was the turmoil in the earth, and dark were the days, and all around was as blackest night. Through this time of Chaos did many demons roam, and much suffering was there. And Lo, a hero did arise, and turned back the darkness, and slew the demons, and freed us from Chaos' reign. His name has been forgotten in the mists of time, so who cares. 

Let us speak of those who came after. A people fair of form, quick of wit, and mightily thirsty. So great was their thirst that they did drain the oceans dry, for in those days it was the sweetest of water.  And such was the wailing and crying of those who loved the sea, that it did fill again with tears of salt, and has remained so until this day. 

But that was not enough, and great were the sounds of their discontent. So loud did they cry and carry on, that old Tuk'Tuk'Naani did rouse from his soused slumber, and blink blearily at them. 

 "Drink!" cried they. "We must have something to drink. O Tuk'Tuk'Naani we beseech thee, drink we must. O! Alas!" And the whining grew piteous indeed, and Tuk'Tuk'Naani did grow weary of their wailing and goings on.


So, to one of their tribe did Tuk'Tuk'Naani show the secrets of the Brewer's Art with the stern warning that they should shut up and let him sleep for a bit.  

And they did rejoice and sing praises to Tuk'Tuk'Naani, but quietly until they were safely out of earshot. Upon which time they did sample this new brew, and to their wonderment, their thirst was quenched, and their women, who were already quite nice to look at, became as goddesses, and they all were funnier and smarter than before. And such was their joy that they did drink heartily to Tuk'Tuk'Naani's health until they joined him in the Sleep of Ages."

"Tuk'Tuk'Naani Brings Beer to the Polynesian MacThoy" as recounted to Groo'Groo'Poonawnee MacThoy.

Last modified: October 01, 2005

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