The Philosopher's Stone

The Philosopher's Stone is a well known part of Alchemy's "Great Work" --the transmogrification of base metals to gold.  The Stone was the key to the process.  It perfected all matter that it touched and was even thought to restore youth and life indefinitely.  The stone was also thought to possess great powers of attraction.

Awwh-Noia MacThoy, a Widow with her own powers of attraction, heard of the stone from Isaac Newton, one winter evening in 1684, while he warmed his hands and his soul in her publick house, the Dirty Ewe.  The young man went on to prove his yarn by showing her the treasured stone.fds

In truth it was no stone but shaped more like a copper with the dull green hue they often get after time's gone by.   It was this coin that Newton showed Noia before going behind her bar counter and pouring himself a stein of water.

This brought a hush to the pub.  All the MacThoy eyes were upon him.  No man had ever entered the Dirty Ewe for a mug of water.


He then drew her close and let the stone drop into the mug.  She gasped in surprise as the clear liquid turned a golden amber.  Tasting confirmed that the water had become a hearty ale.

The Widow quickly recognized the value of such a stone.   She found Newton lodgings in her rooms upstairs and paid him a visit when his candle extinguished for the night.  And thus, she wasted no time in stealing the stone. 

She and her Clan often time amused themselves by changing water to beer or sows' ears into silk purses.

* * *

One night the Stone disappeared.

Following a long round of what at its most complimentary might be described as  deductive reasoning, they came to the conclusion that a servant had picked it up while clearing a table and dropped into the money chest.

They pulled out the chest and began dropping each copper into a mug of water hoping for the change and the Stone to be re-identified but to no avail.  

To her horror, Awwh-Noia realized that the Stone had been given out as change to some unknowing wretch.  And he had gone hence with the stone to pay his landlord or even more horrifying to leave at the local church as tithe.

The Clan continued to search for the Stone for centuries after.  Their search has been carried down through the years as the drinking game, Quarters, where coins are bounced off a table into a drinking vessel in the hopes that the Philosopher's Stone will one day be found. 

Last modified: October 01, 2005

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