The Scotsman
by Mike Cross Oh a Scotsman tried and true left the bar one evening fair
And one could tell by how he walked he'd had more than his share
He stumbled round 'til he could no longer keep his feet
Then he stumbled off unto the grass to sleep beside a stream.
Ring-ding diddle diddle aye-dee-oh
Ring di-diddle-aye-oh
Oh he stumbled off unto the grass to sleep beside a stream.
Well about that time two young and lovely ladies happened by
And one said to the other, with a twinkle in her eye
"Oh see yon sleepy Scotsman, so strong and handsome built?"
"Well I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath their kilts."
Ring-ding diddle diddle aye-dee-oh
Ring di-diddlee-aye-oh
"Oh I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath their kilts."
Well they snuck up to that sleeping Scotsman, quiet as could be
And they lifted up his kilt a little bit so they might see
And there for them to behold, beneath that Scottish skirt,
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth.
Ring-ding diddle diddle aye-dee-oh
Ring di-diddlee-aye-oh
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth.
Well they marveled for a moment, then one said, "We must be gone."
"Well let's leave a present for our friend before we move along."
As a gift, they left a blue silk ribbon tied into a bow
Around the bonnie sword the Scotsman's kilt beneath did show.
Ring-ding diddle diddle aye-dee-oh
Ring di-diddlee-aye-oh
Around the bonnie sword the Scotsman's kilt beneath did show.
Well the Scotsman a little later, he awoke to nature's call
And as he lifted up his kilt, what he got and what he saw,
And in a strangled voice, he said, "I can't believe me eyes!"
"I don't know where ye been, me lad, but I see ye took first prize!"
Ring-ding diddle diddle aye-dee-oh
Ring di-diddlee-aye-oh
"I don't know where ye been, me lad, but I see ye took first prize!"
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