The Monty Python
The
Bruce's Philosophers Song
Immanual Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable
Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy begger
Who could think you under the table
David Hume could out consume
Schopenhauer and Hegel
And Wittenstein was a beery swine
Who was just as schoshed as Schlegel
There's nothing Nietzche couldn't teach ya
'Bout the raising of the wrist
Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed
John Stuart Mill, of his own free will
On half a pint of shandy was particulary ill
Plato they say, could stick it away
Half a crate of whiskey every day
Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle
Hobbes fond of his dram
And Rene' Descartes was a drunken fart
"I drink, therefore I am"
Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed
A lovely little thinker
But a bugger when he's pissed.
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